In Memoriam Page 4

  Finally, I pick up my iPhone and read the texts. Lia and Shar have both texted me four times. Tim’s texted three times. January, twice. Pete, once. Basically, they’re all asking me how I’m doing and if I want to get together today and talk about yesterday. Honestly, I feel like I’d be fine without rehashing it, but I guess part of me could still be in shock. So, chatting about it probably wouldn’t hurt. I text them all at once: “Happy Accidents at 3:30?” If we’re going to chat, we might as well do it at my favorite café.

  Lia: “My mother has a wicked bad headache and I don’t want to leave her alone. Can everyone come over here? Same time: 3:30?”

  Texts pile in and everyone agrees to that. Then I start getting texts from them all individually, asking if I’m OK again. I reply to all of them together encore (again) and say that I’m fine, just exhausted, as I’m sure they all are, and that I’ll talk to them at Lia’s.

  A minute after I send that text my phone actually rings. It’s Tim. “How’s my lady friend?” Well, technically, my phone says Jim because that’s what he’s going by since he and I used sex magick to give him a new face and Pete gave him a new identity.

  “Lady friend? That makes it sound like I’m an escort,” I say and it comes out sounding bitchy.

  He laughs. “You know I didn’t mean it like that.”

  “I know. I’m just feeling drained and I guess it’s making me touchy. Maybe I shouldn’t meet with everyone. I’ll just piss everyone off.” I don’t want to go to Lia’s and snap at everybody the way I just snapped at him. [Which was stupid of me.]

  “You’re coming and you’ll be sitting next to me so you’ll be fine.”

  “As if any of us can be fine today.” Now I sound super depressed.

  “I hear you. How did you sleep?”

  “I don’t know.” I don’t know what to say.

  “How can you not know?”

  I sigh loud enough for him to hear it. “Well, it’s like this – the black magick I have from killing J gave me a horrible nightmare. It felt so real. Like when I hallucinated at the hospital that time. But then I found my Great Grandmother Ruth’s house and I was OK.”

  “So, you had a visit with Ruth? How do you know it was real, that you weren’t dreaming it?”

  “Normally, I’d say it was because I could smell and taste things in her house and I don’t do that in my dreams. But, yeah, I could smell and taste things in the nightmare last night. Gross, gross things. But I know it was really Great Grandmother Ruth. I just do. I felt her aura or something. Just trust me.”

  “Don’t worry, Emma, I believe you. What time should I pick you up?”

  “I don’t know. Ten past three?”

  “Sounds good,” he says. “We’ll get through this.”

  “Nothing we can’t do together, right?” I ask, forcing myself to sound upbeat.

  “Damn straight,” he says and we both laugh for a few seconds, stopping at the same time.

  We say ciao and I wish he was here already. For some reason, despite all of this shit, I’m craving sex. Well, it’s only natural, but I think I just want it right now because it would be a distraction. Something to temporarily take my mind off hier (yesterday). Also, on some level I feel kind of numb and that would make me feel something. It would make me feel alive, whereas I feel so dead inside right now.

  Jim comes to the door at five past three. Five minutes early, but that’s fine. I’m not feeling so bitchy now. In fact, I feel refreshed. Speaking of Tim, he’s actually Jim now. We changed his appearance and Pete gave him a new identity. So he wouldn’t get in trouble with the cops for attacking the late Ken and Troy.

  I already talked to my parents and told them we’re going to Lia’s. My male parental unit got upset, saying I wasn’t allowed to let Jim drive me because he’s “probably a bad driver like most teenagers.” But my mother has a rough idea of what we went through yesterday so she stuck up for me and said that her parents let her go out with her friends when she was my age. [This isn’t exactly true, which I know because I listened to her thoughts and she was berating herself for lying to my father.] Meanwhile, I used telepathy and pushed the thought let her go on him, trying to hypnotize him. After he and my mother bickered a little more he admitted that his parents let him go out with his friends driving when he was my age, too, and he said I could go. He also said that if Jim starts texting while driving I’m supposed to have him pull over, get out of the car and call him or my mother.

  As soon as we get in the car, Jim and I lock lips and unleash our tongues on each other. We make out for a few minutes and I close my eyes and see fireworks, which has happened before when we made out, and all I think about is having sex with him. But, of course, we stop kissing and high tail it to Lia’s.

  “You feel like your batteries are drained today?” he asks when we’re a couple of streets away from my house.

  “Yeah. Mos def,” I say. “Although, I think I might’ve hypnotized my father. He said you couldn’t drive me because you’re a teenager, but then he changed his mind.”

  He smirks at me. “Maybe it was your natural charm?”

  “Maybe,” I say. Then I’m about to say something else and lose my train of thought.

  “You gonna be OK?”

  I sigh and straighten my posture. “I think so. I hope so. As long as I don’t keep having nightmares like last night. How do you feel?”

  “Like a balloon that’s lost most of its helium and it’s about to hit something sharp,” he says, deadpan.

  That’s somewhat disturbing. “Do you feel like you’re going to pop?”

  He sighs heavily. “I don’t know. More like I’ve already popped, if that makes any sense. Like I’ve lost most of my air. I’m also finding it hard to believe that I’m still alive.”

  “Yeah. Me, too.” [I feel like part of me died in J’s lair. Maybe it did.]

  He sucks in his lips before he speaks. “Makes sense. I guess I just feel dead inside. All I can picture is the carnage.”

  “I get it,” I say and squeeze his hand.

  We don’t talk the rest of the way to Lia’s. We look at each other and smile a few times then he takes one hand off the wheel and holds my hand.

  CHAPTER THREE

  EMMA

  January and Pete are already there when we arrive at chez Lia. Pete borrowed his mother’s car and picked her up. I wonder if he has an actual license earned by taking the driving test or if he just hacked the registry and had them send him one.

  Lia and Shar are sitting so close they’re touching on one end of the couch and January and Pete are on the love seat. Tim and I could sit on the other side of the couch, but we decide to take the recliners. They’ve been placed side-by-side, whereas they’re usually on opposite sides of the room.

  “We moved them so they were together for you,” Shar says.

  “Thanks,” Tim says.

  “So, how are you peeps doing today?” January asks. She looks rather despondent, her eye shadow and mascara having smudged from crying and wiping her eyes after. Even if her make up wasn’t smudged, I think one would still see black half circles under her eyes. The sort that come with fighting evil all night. I just want to give her a hug, and a kiss on the cheek, and promise her everything is fine now. I mean, it is, right? Maybe if I said it to her I would believe it myself.

  Nobody says anything. At first it feels like uncomfortable silence – to everyone, I think – but then I feel a little reassured by the fact that I’m not the only one who doesn’t feel like speaking up right now.

  Five minutes later the silence starts becoming less than comfortable again and I decide to say something. “Did you guys have nightmares?” I ask. “I had a horrible nightmare last night. Well, technically, it was this morning, but you get the idea.”

  “In my dreams, I kept getting chased by demons,” Shar says. “The assholes kept teleporting in every direction I went, trying to get one of those mercury collars on me. What about yours?”

 
“Mine was like Shar’s,” Lia says. “In other words, horrifying.”

  I give everyone the short version about my shitty dream. I don’t get into too much detail because they didn’t and I don’t want to seem like an attention whore. For all I know, their nightmares could’ve been worse than mine. Everyone listens attentively though, only Pete appearing distracted. Eventually, I get to the part where Great Grandmother Ruth lets me into her house, saving me.

  “Wait. Did you dream she was there or are you talking about one of your visits now?” January asks.

  “It was an actual visit,” I say. “She said I had to go through all that dark shit to reach her because of the black magick I gained from killing J – that’s what I’m calling the bitch now because she doesn’t deserve to hear her name pass through my lips. Anyway, yeah, she confirmed that those of us who actually killed her are fucked.”

  “Great,” Lia says. “That’s you, me, Shar, January and my mother?”

  “Not January. Fairies can only have the magick their fairy godmother gives them,” I explain. “

  ”More for us. Wonderful,” Shar mutters.

  I hate to tell them it gets worse, but I know I need to. “The black magick is probably why you had those nightmares. Ruth said it can cause them. And she basically said we’re nuclear now and must be careful how we use magick, that we could put a curse on someone just by thinking it.”

  “Great. Something new to worry about,” Lia says sarcastically.

  “Did she say anything else?” Jim asks as he reaches over and holds my hand.

  I bite my bottom lip. I don’t think they’re going to like this. “Yeah. There was one other thing. She said we should look after Krystal and Priscilla, that they’ll really need us.”

  Lia glares at me. “Didn’t we go through the trouble of concocting a very detailed story for them to give the cops so we wouldn’t be linked to them?”

  Pete looks angry, his face turning crimson. “We even parked a couple blocks away from the hospital so we wouldn’t been seen together. Now we’re just supposed to show up and visit them?”

  “Stop and think before you bite my head off,” I say. “We told them to describe Robert, Marco and J. The people who were after us. So, someone is bound to inform our parents about Krystal and Priscilla and how Robert, Marco and J are in the wind, headed for Canada. Point being, we’re all victims of the same perps, giving us a perfectly good reason to go visit them.”

  “I don’t know,” January says. “Could still seem suspicious.”

  “Hey, I’m the most paranoid person here and I don’t think so, largely because Ruth didn’t think it would. Although she did say she can only see so far ahead. But if something awful would happen then I’m sure we’d have a premonition.” I rub the back of my neck because it’s starting to ache, which probably means my blood pressure is high.

  “Don’t we have enough to deal with ourselves?” Shar asks and bites her top lip.

  Lia crosses her arms in front of her. “What are we supposed to do anyway? Let them join our coven?”

  I shake my head. “I don’t think Ruth meant that. She just meant that they could really use friends right now. But if you guys don’t want to help them, that’s fine. I understand. I’m gonna try to be there for them, though. I mean, who else can they talk to about what they went through? Besides, it’ll be nice to think about other people instead of dwelling on all the shit in my head.”

  “What if the police bug their rooms and they start talking about what really happened?” Pete asks, though his face has deflated back to its normal color.

  “I don’t see any reason they’d do that. And we might be able to use telepathy. But, like I said, I’m not gonna drag anyone to the hospital.” [They can be assholes if they want, but I’m not about to turn into a scaredy cat.]

  “I’ll be right there with you,” Jim says, squeezing my hand.

  “Anyway, you don’t have to decide right now. Just think about it,” I say to the others.

  “While we’re thinking about that, I wanted to talk about the coven,” Pete says, his eyes flickering to Lia then Shar before stopping on me. But then he doesn’t say anything.

  “What about it?” I ask.

  He hesitates another beat before speaking. “Well, January and I were thinking it might be cool for me, Jim and Juliana to join you guys.”

  My jaw drops. I did not see that coming. I look at Shar and she’s clenching her jaw while Lia’s face is burning red. Obviously, we weren’t expecting to be hit with this today. Or ever. None of us say anything for a good thirty seconds before Lia finally takes a deep breath and exhales loudly. “Emma, Shar and I have been a trio since we were seven years old. We value your friendship, but our coven is our thing.”

  “Yeah, definitely,” Shar says as Lia puts her arm around her.

  I look at Jim, wondering if he knew Pete was going to propose this. He shakes his head and his wide eyes indicate that he had no idea. I don’t know what I’m supposed to say. I really don’t want anyone else in our coven either. I glare at Pete. “Since when do you want to be a witch?”

  “Since I felt so useless and pathetic sitting in the car yesterday.”

  “You weren’t useless,” I say. “You’re the one who got the drones and blew up the place so no one else can ever use it again. That’s huge.”

  “Still, I’m the only one here who can’t do magick,” he says. “I feel like I’m just the computer geek.”

  “Your computer skills have saved our asses a few times,” Lia says to him. “After the shooting you created the scapegoat that saved us from getting manslaughter charges.”

  “You gave me a new identity,” Jim says. “That’s a big deal, too.”

  “And you got us into Greenmont High,” Shar says.

  “You guys are right,” Pete admits, scratching his head. “But I believe in the Lord and Lady and I know Goddesses have talked to you and I want to be a witch, for religious and magickal reasons. I just want to be like all of you. I don’t see any reason why I shouldn’t. I’ll still be hacker Pete. I’ll just be magickal Pete, too.”

  “C’mon guys, give him a break,” January says, sounding irritated. “After all the shit he’s done for us, which you just re-capped, I think he deserves a little magick. Which I would give him if I could. But humans can’t absorb fairy magick unless they kill the fairy.”

  “But he’s not a natural born witch,” Lia says to January. Then she turns to Pete, “It isn’t in your blood. And the only way we could give you magick is if we let you join the coven. And we just want it to stay the three of us.” She sounds more sympathetic than usual.

  “What about you, Jim?” January asks.

  “What, Jim’s supposed to give him half his magick?” I ask. Now I’m irked.

  “Wait. That’s actually not a bad idea,” Jim says. “I feel like I have too much power. I’m always afraid I’ll over do it, like when I accidentally killed that Troy kid.”

  I look Jim in the eyes and hold his hand. “Need I remind you that you used black magick when you did that?” I’m saying this for Pete’s protection as well as his.

  “She’s right,” Shar says. “I don’t think Pete wants black magick in him.”

  “You all have black magick in you now,” Pete says. “You just said as much, Emma.”

  “He’s right,” Jim says. “Just like anyone has a dark side. But it doesn’t mean you’re gonna become a serial killer.”

  I look at Jim and bite my bottom lip in protest. But it’s obvious that he wants to do this and he wants my blessing. I guess it is his magick to do what he wants with it and if Pete can become magickal without Lia, Shar and I having to disrupt our coven then so be it. I force a half-smile. “Fine. If you want to share your magick with Pete then I’m cool with it.”

  Jim smiles at me. “Merci beaucoup.” Then he looks at Pete. “Want to do it tomorrow after school?”

  “That would be sweet,” Pete says. January grins at him then kisses him
on the cheek, getting light pink lipstick on him.

  Now part of me is tempted to say that if Jim and Pete are going to do that then maybe we should just let them and Juliana join our coven. But part of me squirms, just thinking about it. It would hardly be practical anyway. I mean, we do most of our spells in our bedrooms and there certainly isn’t room for six people in them. Still, I’m sympathetic. I look at Lia and Shar. “Maybe after Jim gives him magick we can teach him some spells, too?”

  Shar whispers something in Lia’s ear.

  “We could do that,” Lia says, not quite smiling. Then she turns to Jim. “But you have to be his mentor.”

  “And I’m cool just being an apprentice,” Pete says. “I’ll do whatever Jim says, like he’s my high priest.”

  Jim laughs hard, making me do the same. Then everyone else laughs a little and we’re all smiling after that. For a moment anyway.

  “I thought we were gonna talk about what happened yesterday?” Lia says.

  For some reason, I start laughing again. Laughing and laughing. So much that everyone ends up looking at me like I’m crazy. And maybe I am because I start tearing up and then I stop laughing and wind up crying hysterically.

  Jim puts his arm around me and kisses my cheek. I look over at Lia and Shar and Shar is shedding tears herself. Lia tightens her arm around her and rubs her shoulder. Then her eyes swell. I pull away from Jim slightly and see that he’s got tears running down his cheeks. My eyes flick to January and Pete and neither of them are crying, though they’re holding hands and they’re both wearing sad expressions.

  Something like ten minutes later we’ve all finally stopped the waterworks.

  “Well, that was cathartic,” Shar says.

  I force a smile. “I thought I was numb.”

  “How do you feel now?” Lia asks.

  “Um, I don’t know. A bit more human. Vulnerable. How do you feel?”

  “I guess depressed and irritable. The way they describe a concussion feeling.”